Feeling Is Not Doing

One of the most important insights The Last Symptom work is built upon is this: feelings are not right or wrong, good or bad.

In fact, this was the first of two epiphanies that eventually led to my own authentic recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Somebody said to me, "Feelings are never good or bad, right or wrong. They aren't anything. They're just information."

I sat there with my mouth hanging open. I realized for the first time that I had always secretly judged myself for the things I was feeling. Quietly. So quietly that until that moment, I had never even been aware I was doing it.

Write this down: Feelings are something we experience. They are not something we do.

Think about going outside without a jacket and feeling a chill. Is that something you are doing? Or something you are experiencing?

Did you choose the chill? No. The chill is information. It tells you something about your surroundings and your needs.

Emotions work the same way. Feeling angry, sad, or happy is not an example of you doing a good thing or a bad thing. It is an example of you experiencing something. And we cannot reasonably be held accountable for anything we are merely experiencing.

Feelings are simply information. Feedback about our needs, our circumstances, our surroundings. Once you hang onto that thread and begin unraveling it, you discover how much unnecessary torture you may have been putting yourself through — all while being completely oblivious that you were doing it at all.

Drawn from The Last Symptom podcast, S2 Ep 50: Feeling Is Not Doing. Listen to the full episode: https://LastSymptom.podbean.com/e/s2-ep50-feeling-is-not-doing/